SHIT HITS THE FAN (Literally) as ASUS x Noctua Collaborative GeForce RTX 3070 is Pictured

So much fucking beige and brown it’s like I’ve been transported into the 70’s.

Previously there were reports that ASSUS, the absolute pinnacle of overpriced gaymer trash aftermarket products and Noctua, holders of the creamy brown crown of producing quality fans for the better part of over a decade were coming together to produce what some would dream to be the best, most hideous and overpriced graphics card the world ever laid eyes on.

And now thanks to a little slip up from a representative over on the ASUS ROG Vietnam facebook page, we’ve had our first glimpse at the truly revolting beast we’ve been anticipating.

This is the result.

Presenting the ASUS GeForce RTX 3070 Noctua OC [RTX3070-O8G-NOCTUA], and boy is she a fucking sight for sore eyes because I am just awash with sheer delight and disgust all at the same time, Noctua being one of the only companies that can give this sensation.

There’s not much dicking around with the overall design of the collaborative effort, with a monstrous 4-slot design that for the most part shields what appear to be full sized 120mm Noctua fans which will insanely prove beneficial for heat dissipation, low noise with low temperatures.

Aside from this the GeForce RTX 3070 Noctua OC comes with a dual 8-pin design along with a nonstanded display output configuration of five total outputs, three of which are DP while there are only two HDMI outputs.

Full sized 120mm fans is basically the ideal scenario for how this collaborative effort would result in being, considering that it’s immensely popular for individuals to mod their graphics card by removing the shroud and tacking on some 120mm case fans resulting in vastly superior thermals, much like how this video from Optimum Tech showcases such mod utilizing an AMD Radeon RX 5700 STRIX with a couple of Noctua NF-A12 fans.

While undoubtedly the ASUS x NOCTUA collab will result in a cool and quiet package it’s not exactly going to come cheap, in fact it’ll probably be as expensive as it does look hideous, with the massive 4-slot design coming in a mixture of black with the familiar Noctua brown aesthetical touches alongside the aforementioned 120mm fans which come in the standard creamy beige and brown design.

According to the ASUS Vietnam representative that gave us this early glimpse before the facebook post was quickly removed, the RTX 3070 Noctua is to land on retail for the sum of around 26 million Vietnamese Dong, converted that equates to around $1150 USD which is very pricy though we can’t exactly tell how much of the barbaric pricing is more or less being reflected on price gouging in third world countries and not the fact that Noctua tend to sell such 120mm fans $30 USD a pop.

Because not only is ASUS “premium” but Noctua is rightfully so, with their fans always being tested as being among the top percentage if not the outright best, though increased competition has made Noctua fans more or less redundant especially in terms of overall value.

And of course they’ll continue to shaft their consumers with horrible brown and beige plastics whereas ThermalFake will literally go and steal their design, produce something along the terms of being 90% as good as the Noctua in a color scheme you’d actually want where you can effectively purchase two Thermaltake fans for the price of one Noctua.

Though of course nothing can beat ARCTIC in terms of value with their beloved P12 fans, or in special cases perhaps Phanteks bundles.

This ASUS x Noctua collab has me feeling a bit weird, I like it and yet I don’t because I know that the pros of it being as cool and quiet as one can imagine it’ll just have the cons of being generally overpriced shit while being revolting to look at.

I’m sorry but I’d rather just buy cheaper shit and tack on a couple fans myself and probably have a couple hundred dollars left over to perhaps buy a Noctua D15 even if you really wanted to get shafted by some beige and brown Austrian.